If you were thinking of reading Manny Howard’s book “My Empire of Dirt,” I strongly recommend against this course of action for two reasons:
1. Howard writes like he’s being paid by the dependent clause, with headache-inducing sentences like:
“The lower reaches of the East River have teemed with traffic since the earliest Dutch settlements in the 1670s, and I spent most of my childhood living up on the bluffs above Old Fulton Street, the site where, in 1814, Robert Fulton inaugurated regular steamboat-ferry service between Brooklyn and Manhattan and made Brooklyn boom.”
Here’s another whopper, chosen at random:
“Still, I don’t know if I side with the locavore, or his critic, who claims that the titans of agriculture have it right, that massive quantities of food packed inside cargo containers hauled aboard enormous trains (which advocates say carry unimaginably heavy loads 435 on one gallon of gasoline) and in the holds of oceangoing ships are much less wasteful in the long run than weekly – nay, daily – parades of local artisanal producers trundling off to greenmarkets in beater cargo vans or late-model Subaru station wagons to sell their certifiably wholesome foodstuffs to eager urbanites, holed up, isolated, and ignorant, without the means or practical skills necessary to grow their own food.”
2. Howard has no business owning animals.
He has no interest in animals, no empathy for them, no aptitude for their care, and no inclination to research their needs. He is one of those people who think of animals as animate objects, like toys whose batteries don’t need changing.
I stopped reading after “the songbird debacle,” when he bought a dozen songbirds for his two year-old daughter on a whim, neglected them for a week (in which nine of them died), and killed the remaining three in a drunken rage (one with his bare hands). Yes, really.
You’re welcome!
Oh, that sounds horrible! I hadn’t heard of the book before. Is it a true story or fiction? Please say fiction. I had to stop reading a book once when I was in late grade school, because the book described some despicable punk stomping on a guinea pig to spite the protagonist. Cue very unhappy imagination. I don’t recall what the book was, except that it had something to do with unicorns.
It’s a true story, I’m afraid.
I didn’t even know it was legal to buy and sell songbirds. (Or are we talking about things like zebra finches, that are not actually native).
Wild animals, in general, make very poor pets, and they tend to be miserable in the process.
Funny coincidence there!
I was in the library, killing a few minutes, saw this on the feature table and picked it up.
I also got just past the bird murders scene, and put it down.
I was willing to overlook the dreadful, self-important grandiose “she had me when she told me it was a ‘Manny Howard Story’ writing style. Then the bird thing, I mean, seriously, no more.
Thanks for the heads-up. This sounds like the kind of book my book club might want to read, and now, without reading it, I can strongly argue against it.
Non-fiction animal cruelty is bad, and using it as a plot-moving device in fiction is worse. (My 2 cents for today)
Clarity. Organization.
These are little things this guy might want to consider.
How did this crap get published? Or is Manny Howard a celebrity? (There are just so many of them now I can’t be bothered to keep track) Could he not afford an editor?
And of all the things i can’t stand, animal cruelty is very close to top of the list. By a long way. Even over people who beat their grannies.
After seeing him on the Colbert Report I would not have considered reading the book. Seriously the guy came across as a whack job. Stephen had fun with him, I thought, could barely keep a straight face.
I too wondered why it would get published, but alas, this sort of stuff sells.
I have heard excellent things about Farm City (I think that’s the name) but haven’t checked it out yet.
What an unfortunate person. I am NOT going to read his book.
How can this guy not be facing charges of neglect and cruelty? Coudldn’t which show he was on, but remember that I thought he was a pompous self important ass.
This, ugh, this is sickening
In retrospect (this guy makes me angry) on his Colbert interview they talked about how he ended up killing an animal (I think a rabbit) where he claims he was startled by the thing and it was an accident. Make me wonder if that’s really true
Blech! That sounds awful. I’ve read fanfic better than that. I’ve read _crossover_ fanfic better than that. Heck, I’ve read Wolverine/Draco fanfi–well, maybe that was pretty bad…
I long for a semi-colon in that second passage.
If this book ever sneaks on my booklist, I’ll cross it right back off again. With a really big marker.
Doesn’t the man know there’s a worldwide comma shortage??
Jenn – if you’re any aficianado of bad fan fic, you must be aware of http://www.toplessrobot.com, yes?
His sentence structure is disconcertingly similar to my own but he did WHAT?! to some sweet pet birds? He should be put down.