I’ve started referring to Ernesto as “Jackass.” For one thing, he isn’t at all nice. In fact, on his Personality panel, on the 1-10 scale from “Grouchy” to “Nice,” he has a 1 (Grouchy). I’m constantly steering him away from picking fights with random Sims.
This is a flaming bag of poo. You know why it was left on the doorstep of his dorm? Neither do I. It showed up the night after he A) flirted with someone else while he was on a date and B) had a big ol’ fight with one of his roommates. Honestly, anyone could have left it.
I decided to re-style his hair, so he at least looks a little less grim. That Spock haircut wasn’t doing anything for him.
For another thing, he’s a Romance Sim. I hate Romance Sims. Romance Sims love the romance, but they hate commitment. Once they’re in a relationship, all they want to do is make out with other Sims. They roll Fears like “get engaged” and “get married.” If you manage to wrestle them into a commitment, they immediately roll Wants like “Woo Hoo with 3 other Sims.” Jackass.
Let’s talk about some of the other dorm residents for a moment.
These two chuckleheads flunked out of college. Believe It Or Not!
Eleanor fell in love with a random Sim who came to visit. Don’t they look adorable in this shot? I wish the lighting had been better.
Dean Drew (Eleanor and Ernesto’s uncle) fell in love with one of his roommates. They both graduated soon after, and have moved back to Desiderata Valley.
Okay, back to Ernesto. At one point while he was talking to a random male student, the “flirty” options appeared on his conversational menu. I panicked for a second. Think of the bloodlines! Boys can’t make babies with other boys!
Then I realized two things:
1) This isn’t medieval France. “Bloodline” is an archaic hocus pocus concept from the days when blood-letting was considered medicine.
2) It is a computer game. They are not real people.
So I told him to go for it.
They graduated from college, returned to the Alphabetti ancestral home, and got married. (The pink tux wasn’t my idea, by the way. It was randomly assigned by the game.)
Turns out, Makoto Alphabetti neé Sell is also a Romance Sim. That’s why this shot is so awkward and unromantic. Immediately after the wedding they were like, “Hey that’s cool. Let’s go bowling.” I actually had to steer them both back towards the wedding arch to get this shot. Exasperating.
The Generation E wedding picture has been added to the family portrait wall. I admit, I get a little misty every time I put up a new one.
Like I said, Romance Sims are nothing but trouble. They do things like throw a sh*t fit when you
buy adopt a baby for them.
But I can’t blame all of Ernesto’s jackassery on being a Romance Sim. Makoto is a much better father than Ernesto. Here he’s cuddling their first adoption, Frank.
Makoto actually feeds the bottle to the baby, instead of setting both the baby and the bottle on the floor and walking away. If I tell Makoto to change the baby’s diaper, he actually changes the baby’s diaper. Instead of canceling the action out of his queue and wandering off to play the guitar. Jackass.
Here’s Makoto holding their second adoption, Fiona.
I like Makoto a lot more than I like Ernesto. In fact, I’ve sent Ernesto off on the Science career track. Once he’s gotten high enough to earn a Cow Plant, I’m pretty sure I’m going to feed him to it. And laugh.