In your most recent commercial, the guy says he wouldn’t have married his wife if he’d known that her credit was sub-par.
This is the most appalling sentiment I’ve ever seen publicly expressed.
Dear Discovery Channel,
I’m glad it’s Shark Week. But we all know you’ll be back to airing eight-hour blocks of “Deadliest Catch” re-runs come August 4th.
Dear Sci Fi Channel,
“Ghost Hunters International” stinks. Please go back to airing “Ghost Hunters” re-runs instead.
Dear Wave Cable,
Why do you air so many commercials for Wave Cable? I daresay anyone watching you already HAS Wave Cable.
Dear Family Guy,
“American Dad” is a better show than you’ll ever be. (Ironic!) You are the show that I watch while I’m waiting for “American Dad” to air.
Please get canceled again. You no longer interest me.
Dear paper towel commercials,
I’m cheap. I mean really cheap. And yet, I have never once rinsed a paper towel and re-used it. Why you’re so fixated on this “feature” is beyond me.
Dear Sonic Drive-In,
Your various frozen dessert beverages look delicious. I wish you wouldn’t air your commercials in a market where your restaurants don’t exist. It’s kinda mean.
Dear Venture Bros,
You complete me.