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Sims Sunday: The Biological Clock Says “Tick Tock”

People, THIS GAME IS STRESSING ME OUT. When I created Helvetica as an adult in Sims 3, I left her lifespan at “normal” because it didn’t occur to me to do otherwise. I also sent her into the game alone, leaving her family behind in the old neighborhood.

An adult Sim with a normal lifespan hits the ground with 14 Sim days before they turn into an Elder. Buying a house leaves them with so little money that they have to get jobs. (I could cheat on the funds, but where’s the fun in that?) This leaves the single Sim with precious little time in which to find a man, get herself knocked up, and carry a baby to term.

Helvetica had a wish to sign up for the medical career, which I duly obeyed. I started sending her out to community lots after work. But the life of a medical intern is exhausting, so she has little time for socializing before she has to go home and collapse in bed.

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Here I am, waiting outside the hospital for her to finish work so that we can hit the town.

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This is Hunter Cottoneye, the first man she met. Hunter is unemployed and mean-spirited. Five minutes after they met, he informed her that she needs to get more exercise. Humiliated, she bade him goodnight and slunk home.

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This is Billy Caspian, an unemployed artistic fellow who – the game informed me – is RICH. Jackpot!

After I learned this, I switched to map view and tracked down his house. You can click on your friends’ houses and zoom in to examine them.

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Not bad!

As I was taking this screenshot, I couldn’t decide if this was a really creepy thing to be doing. On the one hand, it’s a computer program. These people aren’t real.

On the other hand? Totally creepy thing to be doing.

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Speaking of creepy, I went a little crazy with the new Create A Style tool. This allows you to customize the color/pattern/surface texture of everything on your lot. You can even pick one color out of a pattern, and change that particular color. For example, the fabric of her couch originally had a blue background.

Since Helvetica’s favorite color is gray, I decided to redo her house entirely in white and gray. Now her living room makes me think of Farscape, but I can’t be arsed to change it.

Helvetica spent several days trying to woo Billy. Whenever she called, he was too busy to talk. When she invited him over, he declined her invitation. DUDE, THE CLOCK IS TICKING.

He finally accepted an invitation to go out somewhere together. Once they had greeted each other, the first thing he did was tell her that she needs to exercise more.

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What.

I didn’t even have her say goodbye. I just told her to go home, and she walked away from him without a second thought.

THESE LOSERS ARE WASTING HER TIME.

The next night after work I sent her over to the Broke household, behind her house. There she met this charming fellow, Buck Broke. Will you check out the pervy little mustache!

sims sunday

Helvetica was drawn to him. Shortly after meeting him, all of her wishes were Buck-related. “Chat with Buck.” “Learn Buck’s interests.” “Give Buck a friendly hug.” Seriously – I wanted to puke. I’m surprised she didn’t start doodling “Mrs. Helvetica Broke” on the cover of her notebook.

Whatever his other shortcomings, Buck proved to be a pretty decent guy. He’s also flirty, which helped move things along. And at least he’s not yet told her she’s fat.

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Unfortunately, Buck has a night job at the mausoleum. And in Sims 3, if you invite a Sim over to your house, they still maintain their job schedule. This means that every night they have about two hours to hang out before Buck has to go to work.

sims sunday

“WHAAAARGL SLOBBER SLOBBER GIVE ME A BABY.”

Despite making progress with Buck, the baby clock has essentially run out. Helvetica is going to have to adopt, and hope that either she can afford to live without a job, or that her job will pay enough to hire a nanny. Or maybe she’ll be able to convince Buck Broke to move in with her as a primary caregiver? Impossible to say at this point.

8 comments to Sims Sunday: The Biological Clock Says “Tick Tock”

  • Slager

    I made the mistake of creating my first Sim as an Adult instead of a Young Adult. There’s little difference except that you get more time if you start with a Young Adult. I was still thinking in Sims 2 mode, it seems. Now my Sim’s husband is going to outlive her by dozens of days.

  • Melsa

    I can already see I’m going to have a hard time not cheating with Sims 3. I’m disappointed a bit that Helvetica is getting old so quickly, I like her!

  • Buck’s overalls are the deal-breaker for me. Cheesy mustaches can be shaved… but a man who wears overalls and who isn’t a farmer has deeper issues.

    DON’T DO IT, HELVETICA!

  • What is up with the male Sims and telling a (perfectly slender) female she needs to exercise more? Were they programmed by MeMe Roth or someone?

  • kellys

    wow. RL feels like it moves this fast sometimes…talk about scary.

  • Elizabeth

    But what about the rest of the Alphabettis? Won’t we get updates on them?

  • Another Erika

    I’m glad Helvetica has the self-assurance to kick those guys to the curb when they insult her weight.

  • 8D

    What do you mean it ran out? She’s not an elder, is she? Because I had a sim that had twin girls three days before she turned into an elder.